1.I Hate You, I Love You
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Let's get out there
Ya, that was me
One, two, one, two, three, four
What am I gonna do
When I get close to you？
Wanna hold you next to me
But you bring me misery
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
Let's go to see a show
Which one well I don't know
Will you make up your mind
Or are you gonna waste my time
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
Look back to the time we met
Were things better I forget
You acted different then
I thought you were a friend
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, but I love you
I hate you, I love you
I hate you, I love you
Yes, I do
2.Cousin Earl
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Now you wanna talk about bladder problems
Then the man you wanna talk to will probably be my cousin Earl
I guess you all know Earl
He lives out on Route 13 out on that maggot farm
Earl don't like it when you get his maggot farm
Confused with a worm farm
A worm farm is for worms and a maggot farm is for maggots
And Earl's got the biggest maggots in the state, three feet long
Of course, now Earl believes this might be due to the fact that
St. Smithen's Medical Facility
Has been dumping their waste on his property
Interesting thing about three-foot maggots is that
That, well, one day the china disappeared
And then the next day his television disappeared
And then a few days after that his '57 Chevy disappeared
But there they are the world's biggest maggots
Anyway one day Earl and I were standin' in the kitchen
Giant maggots crawlin' across the floor
And Earl turns to me and he says
'Do you ever go to make a pork sausage
And find that it's got hairs all over it？'
And he gives me a look that still chills me to this day
Now Earl's got a son and they call him Earl Junior
Which I think is pretty clever since he is Earl's son
He's not really a normal boy
Ever since that tractor accident
Anyway, he ran up $5,000 worth of 976 phone bills
He called weird, unnatural numbers like 976-PIGG with two G's
And 976-SHEEP, which has five letters in it
I know he's a sick boy
Earl suggested that well, maybe I talk to him
So I went into his bedroom and I sat him down
But before I could say a word Earl Junior looked at me and he
said
'Didja ever go to make a pork sausage
And find it's got hairs all over it？'
And he gave me a look that still chills me to this day
Now, Earl's got a daughter and they call her Effie-Sue
And Effie-Sue, she don't look so much like a little girl
As she looks like a, a big pile of fungus
Earl blames this too on the fact that
St. Smithen's Medical Facility has been dumpin' on his maggot
farm
And I never had much contact with Essie, Effie-Sue
Excuse me, I don't even think that much of her to get her name
right
I never had much contact with her
She just normally just sits on the couch
Like a little ball of fungus and just boils away
Well, one day, she looked at me
And that little ball of fungus opened its mouth
(Or what I guess was its mouth I'd hate to think what else it
could be)
And out of that orifice floated the words
'Didja ever go to make a, a pork sausage
And find it's got hair all over it？'
And then that, that little pile of fungus
Gave me a look that chills me to this day
Now Earl's got a wife and we call her wife, we don't know her
name
Because she's never really said that much
For the longest time we thought she could only say two words
Which were 'Dog' and 'Pussy', we thought that meant 'Dog' and
'Cat'
But then we found out that
What she was really trying to say was 'Dog-pussy'
One big hyphenated word which doesn't come up much in
conversation
Especially amongst Baptists
We never heard her say anything other than that
You know she works down at
Down at St. Smithen's Medical Facility and Pork Sausage
Distillery
Got a good paying job there although she only does say those
Well that one word
And we have heard her say another thing once
But that was a long time ago we were sittin' around the house
And she looked at me and she said
'Do you ever go to make a pork sausage
And find that it's got hairs growin' all over it？'
And she gave me a look that chills me to this day
Now one day Earl took his whole family fishin' down in Miller's
Creek
He took his wife who could only say, 'Dog-pussy'
He took his son Earl Junior who took the day off from calling
976 - barnyard numbers
And he took that little that little ball of fungus daughter
Effie-Sue of his along with him
They all got in a little boat and they started fishing
Now St. Smithen's Medical Facility and Pork Sausage Distillery
Has been known to dump their stuff into Miller's Creek
All sorts of heinous stuff, big barrels floatin' in the creek
With little things on them that say
'St. Smithen's Medical Facility and Pork Sausage Distillery'
Anyway Earl was fishing
And he caught a wall-eyed bass which had twenty-seven eyes on it
It was a twenty-seven-eyed wall-eyed bass
Earl looked at it, and decided, 'Umm, wouldn't this be good to
eat'
So he took out his knife to cut it open
But that fish looked up at him and it said
'Please, mister please don't eat me'
And Earl said, 'But I'm hungry I'm hungry'
'I work on a maggot farm
My wife can only say 'Dog-pussy'
My daughter is a pile of fungus
My son spent all of his college money calling '976-' numbers
I have to eat you'
And that fish said, 'Please, don't eat me, mister, please'
And he said, 'I have to I have to'
So the fish said, 'Alright then, if you're gonna cut me open
Let me ask you one question'
Didja ever go to eat a pork sausage
And find it's got hairs growin' all over it？'
And then all twenty-seven eyes stared back at Earl
And they stared back at his wife who could only say, 'Dog-pussy'
And they stared back at his weird 976 - animal-calling son
And they stared back at that little pile of pus
That passes for Earl's daughter
And they gave them a look
All twenty-seven eyes gave them a look
A look that they will not forget until this very day
Oh, man
3.Anderson, Walkman, Buttholes and How!
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
We've got to get together
And we've got to save the snails
Let's board the purple spaceships
Before they set sail
I want a Yes reunion
And you know I want one now
No more Anderson
Walkman, Buttholes and How!
Listening to the opera
And smoking angels' dust
You can't get more fucking
Progressive than us
4.Methodist Coloring Book
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Dean, hey there's a big airplane goin' by
Rodney, get it, go, go
Some recording guy, It's on the track
Rodney, leave it, get it on the track
Joe, get it, get it, catch it
Dean, I got it
You've got a methodist coloring book and you color really well
But don't color outside the lines or God will send you to Hell
'Cause God hates war and God hates crime
A' but He really hates people, who color outside the lines
You've got a methodist coloring book
Don't color outside the lines
'Cause if God doesn't strike you with lightning
He'll at least make you go blind
Good people get sent to the attic
Bad people will roast in the cellar
But there's a special kind a' Hell
For those who just won't learn to color
God is gracious, God is good, so let's color in his book
God wears cotton, God wears rayon, He can mend a broken crayon
God is honest, He don't take payola
Let's all thank him for our Crayola's
You got a methodist coloring book
You got a methodist coloring book
You got a methodist coloring book
(Ah, oh, oh)
(Ah, oh, oh)
You got a methodist coloring book
You got a methodist coloring book
You got a methodist coloring book
(Oh, oh, oh, a very emotional performance)
You've got a methodist coloring book
And you color really well
But don't color out side the lines
Or God will send you to Hell
5.Do the Brown Nose
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen
And welcome to P.J.'s Astrological Love Lounge
We are Lester Shy and the Shyphonics
My name is Lester Shy and these fine gentlemen all around me
Well, they're the Shyphonics
And we hail proudly from Fargo, North Dakota
Now, way down south in Fargo
Whenever we needs a little somethin' extra
We like to do a little thing we call the brown nose
And we'd like all you fine ladies and gentlemen here tonight
To help us out in doin' the brown nose
So remember, when I shout, 'What you gonna do？'
You're gonna shouts back, 'Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose'
Think you can handle that？
I'm pretty sure you can, let's give it a try
What you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
Oh, ladies and gentlemen, you should all be round up and shot
That was terrible
What you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
Yes, yes, that's so much better
You have my permission to go out and reproduce
You're lovely human beings
So now we're gonna do a little brown nosin' for ya
Are you excited？ Are you ready？
Okay then, here we go
When you want that job, I say, now, what you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
There's rich uncle Bob, I say, now, what you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
You get stopped by the man, I say, now, what you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
Record company wants to sign your band
I say, now, what you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
Mercy
Alright
Now, I know many of you fine ladies and gentlemen
Have begun to ask yourself
Ooh but Lester Shy and the Shyphonics
How do we do this wild new thing you call the brown nose？
Well, take a second
Prepare yourself mentally and physically
We'll show you how to brown nose
Bend your knees
(Bend yo', ooh, lalala)
Now move your head like this
(Ooh, lalala)
Pucker dem lips
(Ooh, lalala)
Give dat butt a kiss
(Ooh)
Kiss my
Askin' for some green, I say, now, what you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
Boss is really mean, I say, now, what you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
You wanna impress your a' girlfriend's father
I say, now, what you gonna do？
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
You owe some money a' to your brother
I say, â½now, what you gonna do？â
(Gonna brown nose, gonna brown nose)
You, yes you, here's a dime, run out and call the PMRC
(Okay)
Gonna brown nose
I wanna see every last one of you brown nosin'
Even you tuna lips
Alright, if you can dig it, I wanna hear you shout
Erlenmeyer Flask
(Erlenmeyer Flask)
Alright, I know you loved it the first time
You gonna love it even more the second time
As once more, we prepare to get down
And do some serious big time brown nosin'
Bend your knees
(Bend yo', ooh, lalala)
Now move your head like this
(Ooh, lalala)
Pucker dem lips
(Ooh, lalala)
Give dat butt a kiss
(Ooh)
Kiss my
(Ya)
6.In Praise of Sha Na Na
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na were the kings of Woodstock
You know, it's true deep in your heart
Greasy guys in gold lame
If only Hendrix had been so smart
Pete Townshend wouldn't be so deaf
If he followed Sha Na Na's advice
And played fifties doo-wop songs that
Even your mom would think are nice
Keith and Janis went away
But Sha Na Na is here to stay
I don't care about Joan Baez
Sha Na Na can wear my fez
At least it rhymes
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na were the kings of the sixties
Deep in your heart you know it's true
All those kids at Berkeley dressed like bowser
They didn't like the stones or the who
Sha Na Na didn't need flower power
They didn't drive a yellow submarine
Yet they were the guys who called the shots
Sha Na Na really made the scene
Keith and Janis went away, so long
But Sha Na Na is here to stay
I don't care about Joan Baez
Sha Na Na can wear my fez
Once again it rhymes
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na shot Kennedy
Sha Na Na stabbed that guy at Altamont
Sha Na Na started the Peace Corps
Sha Na Na were the first astronauts
Sha Na Na joined the Black Panthers
Sha Na Na led student sit-ins
Sha Na Na grew organic food
Sha Na Na just never fit in
You can move to Montana
And listen to Santana
But you still won't be
As cool as Sha Na Na
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na, Sha Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na, Sha Na Na Na Na
Sha Na Na Na Na
7.If You Love Somebody, Set Them on Fire
(sound of match striking)
Know that it would be untrue
Know that I would be a liar
If I was to say to you
I didn't set your house on fire
But it's just the way I am
Have to take it for a fact
Life can really burn you up
When you're a pyromaniac
So...
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
I went to your house last night
Dad called me the human torch
Got a little pissed at him
So I burned down your front porch
Now I feel a little better
About throwin' gas on your dad
But you know it's hard to quit
And besides he started it
I just bought a brand new lighter
And I just can't wait to use it
With a can a' kerosene it's lots a' fun
You can't refuse it
Oily rags are special things
You know to me they're diamond rings
Maybe we can have some fun
Maybe we can burn someone
So...
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
Know that it would be untrue
Know that I would be a liar
If I was to say to you
I didn't set your dad on fire
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
If you love somebody
Why not set them on fire？
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
If you love somebody
Why not set them on fire？
8.V.F.W.
Lyricist：Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Mom and dad don't like me
They say I'm mean and crude
They tried to make me a good little boy
By sticking downers in my food
Fucked up world
We're all veterans of a fucked up world
Fucked up world
We're all members of a fucked up world
My neighbors try to run me down
Because I'm such a mess
Maybe it's because of the way I look
Or maybe the way I dress
Philosophers try to put me down
Hey, what's the meaning of life？
Go kill a cop and drink till you drop
Baby that's my advice
In a fucked up world
We're all veterans of a fucked up world
Fucked up world
We're all members of a fucked up world
Girls don't really like me
That's why I hate myself
Maybe it's because of the way I look
Or maybe it's something else
My room is such a pig sty
My floor has never been swept
But I've got a fuck off attitude
And that's something that should be kept
In a fucked up world
We're all veterans of a fucked up world
Fucked up world
We're all members of a fucked up world
9.Tiny Town
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Hello, my name is Billy Bob
And I don't give a damn
I got myself some white sheets
Straight from the Ku Klux Klan
I got myself a daughter
And she's a Mongoloid
Because I married my sister
And our Gene pool's been destroyed, let's do it
This is a tiny town
And we don't want you comin' 'round
This is a tiny town
And we don't want you comin' 'round
We got ourself a sheriff
And his name's Bobby Joe
One day he said to me
'Them Punk rockers gotta go'
So we hopped into his pickup truck
With a gun rack on the back
And we beat up on them punks
And we beat up on them blacks because
This is a tiny town
And we don't want you comin' 'round
This is a tiny town
And we don't want you comin' 'round
So if you should happen
To come to our little town
It might be wise
If you didn't hang around
'Cause we hate blacks
And we hate Jews
And we hate punks
But we love the F.U.s, let's do it
This is a tiny town
And we don't want you comin' 'round
This is a tiny town
And we don't want you comin' 'round
10.Nutrition
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Now my life is easy, my life ain't hard
I'm gonna spend all day in my fuckin' backyard
I ain't got no money, hell, I don't care
My parents let me use their credit card
I've got nowhere to go, just hang out on the street
My folks say I've got no ambition
At least I give a shit about the stuff I eat
Yeah, I care about nutrition
Tried to get a job at the retail store
But I could not stand the competition
Now I spend all my time hangin' out at the shore
Givin' myself a skin condition
I've got nowhere to go, just movin' on my feet
People say I've got no ambition
At least I give a shit about the stuff I eat
Yeah, I care about nutrition
Sometimes I get upset when I see on the TV
All them people in this world that is starvin'
But there's nothin' in this world that could possibly bother me
When I smell the turkey Dad is carvin'
Boy, I'm starvin', Christ, I'm starvin'
My folks said I gotta get myself a job
'Cause they ain't gonna support me
Well, if all I am to them is just some lazy slob
Why didn't they abort me？
I guess I'll just hang out on Broad and South
Livin' by my intuition
At least I give a shit what I put into my mouth
Yeah, I care about nutrition
Nutrition, It's good for me
Nutrition, I've got vitamin C
I care, I care, I care, I give a healthy shit
And Mom and Dad say if I eat all of my food
I can go to the hard core show and see f.o.d.
11.Plum Dumb
Lyricist：Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Shulthise
She stands there on the corner, got raspberry jeans
Waiting and watching, oh God, here he comes
He pulls up beside her in his sporty machine
Rolls down the window and hands her a bag of plums
Plums？ Eat them he tells her they'll make ya feel great
She hops in the car he steps on the gas
She says can't you drive faster, it's getting late
Just a wee bit faster you're not going to fast
Oh, freeway riding down the freeway
Cruisin' now he's really cruisin'
When the plums take affect
Yes the plums suddenly juice her mind
She is no longer a nervous wreck
Now her nerves are blind, she feels fine
Oh, I feel great she says but he already knows it
'Cause she's fingering his hair and biting his toes
She's really plumbed out and in her eyes she shows it
She says what's the hurry？ Let's drive more slow
Moisture drips from her edible lips
And as he looks into her eyes he is quick to realize
That he'd better pull over before he gets to Dover
'Cause if he really wants her now the time is wise
Freeway riding down the freeway
Cruisin' now you're really cruisin'
When the plums take affect
Yes the plums suddenly juice her mind
She is no longer a nervous wreck
Now her nerves are blind, she feels fine
She's plum dumb
Plum dumb
Plum it, plum it, plum it
Plum it, plum it, plum it
Ya
12.Bitchin' Camaro
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Hey Jack, what's happenin'？
I don't know
Well uh, rumor around town says
You might be thinkin' 'bout goin' down to the shore
Uh, yeah, I think I'm gonna go down to the shore
What ya gonna do down there？
Uh, I don't know, play some video games
Buy some Def Leopard T-shirts
Don't forget your Motley Cure T-shirt
You know all proceeds go to get their lead singer out a' jail
Uh huh
Can't wait to go down
Hey uh, were ya gonna check out the sand bar while you're down
there？
Uh, what's the Sand Bar？
Ah, it's a place that lets sixteen year-old kids drink
Ah, cool
Ya hey, guess who's gonna be there？
Uh, who？
My favorite cover band, Crystal Ship
Wow
Yeah, they do a Doors show
You'd be really impressed, in fact, it goes a little like this
Love me two times baby
Love me twice today
Love me two times girl
'Cause I got AIDS
Love me two times baby
Once for tomorrow
Once cause I got AIDS
Uh
Pretty good Jim Morrison impersonation there
I hope those guys have a good sense a' humor
And don't take us into court
Uh, what's the court？
Never mind that, the important thing here
You mean the People's Court
The now, that's another story
The important thing here is that we get to the part where
You ask me how I'm gonna get down to the shore
Oh, how you gettin' down to the shore？
Funny you should ask, I've got a car now
Ah wow, how'd ya get a car？
Oh, my folks drove it up here from the Bahamas
You're kidding
I must be, the Bahamas are islands
Okay, the important thing here is that
Uh, you ask me what kinda car it is
Uh uh, what kinda car do ya' got？
I've got a bitchin' Camaro
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
I ran over my neighbors
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Now I'm in all the papers
My folks bought me a bitchin' Camaro
With no insurance to match
So if I happen to run you down
Please don't leave a scratch
I ran over some old lady
One night at the county fair
And I didn't get arrested
Because my dad's the mayor
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Donuts on your lawn
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Tony Orlando and Dawn
When I drive past the kids
They all spit and cuss
'Cause I've got a bitchin' Camaro
And they have to ride the bus
So you'd better get out of my way
When I come through your yard
'Cause I've got a bitchin' Camaro
And an Exxon credit card
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Hey man where ya headed？
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
I don't want unleaded
13.Dean's Dream
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
It's a Friday night cookin' show
With a horse-meat dish
I had to stay in the freezer
All Thursday eve
Talkin' to that horse, I really had to go
Down to the sidewalk
The sky's all red, the street's filled with people
From a High School band
I escaped to a theater to see a girl
With long blonde hair, right down to there
I escaped from a theater to see a girl
With long blonde hair, we had to leave
We got in a tan van, us two in the back
With Steve McGarrett from Hawaii Five-O
At the steering wheel, speeding away
We slide into a parking lot
And all in slow motion these tough guys appear
We argue and fight and one pulls a knife
He hits me in the back but I'm all right
I'm all right, I'm all right, I'm all right
(He's all right)
I escaped from a theater to see a girl
With long blonde hair right down to there
I escaped from a theater to see a girl
14.Lucky
Lyricist：Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
1, 2, 3, huh
Little Billy drunk on beer
Plops down behind the steering wheel
His prom date pukes on her brand new dress
He wonders who'll clean up the mess
His car skids goes off the road
Hits a tree and then explodes
His death was quick painless they say
Hope when I die, I go that way
But, you may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
Little Debbie drunk on wine
Says she's havin' a very good time
She thinks she's havin' the time of her life
Prom date sharpens a big butcher knife
Like a cheap horror movie on the silver screen
The night is filled with deadly screams
Would've been salesman's famous capers
It even made the big city papers
You may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
President laughs shaves his head
Pushes the button and bombs the Reds
Reds hits back with all they've got
Now we're all in the melting pot
Let's have a big cheer for the government
Who's finally ended our descent
Vaporized masses in the shopping mall
Never got to see the H-bomb fall
Little Billy drunk on beer
Plops down behind the steering wheel
His prom date pukes on her brand new dress
He wonders who'll clean up the mess
His car skids goes off the road
Hits a tree and then explodes
His death was quick painless they say
Hope when I die, I go that way
But, you may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
You may not be so lucky
Never gonna be so lucky
Little Debbie drunk on wine
Says she's havin' a very good time
She thinks she's havin' the time of her life
Prom date sharpens a big butcher knife
Like a cheap horror movie on the silver screen
The night is filled with deadly screams
Would've been salesman's famous capers
It even made the big city papers
15.Tugena
16.Big Lizard in my Backyard
Big lizard in my backyard
Can't afford to feed him anymore
Big lizard in my backyard
Bustin' down my neighbour's door
I bought a big lizard
Only a dollar fifty
Well, that's pretty neat
Yeah it's fuckin' nifty
But I just can't afford to feed it
And you should see the way it shits
I've got a big lizard in my backyard
Can't afford to feed it anymore
Big lizard in my backyard
Bustin' down my neighbour's door
I was knocked outta bed
Late last night
I was woken up by the sound of dynamite
I ran downstairs to find an army man
He said 'We gotta blow up those things we don't understand!'
There's no more big lizard in my backyard
I won't have to feed him anymore
No more lizard in my backyard
They shipped his ass to El Salvador!
Was knocked outta bed
Late last night
I was woken up by the sound of dynamite
I ran downstairs to find an army man
He said 'We gotta blow up those things we don't understand!'
Big lizard in my backyard
Can't afford to feed it anymore
Big lizard in my backyard
Bustin' down my neighbour's door
I bought a big lizard
Only a dollar fifty
Well, that's pretty neat
Yeah it's fuckin' nifty
But I just can't afford to feed it
17.Quality Of Death
The man who spoke at graduation
Said 'Life doesn't come with a manual'
But one week later I found one
In that Thrift store on Second and Samuel
The weathergirl on the TV
Said April showers bring May flowers
The next day our town was flooded
Hundreds died in a matter of hours
Every cloud has a silver lining
And every dog has his day
But acid rain and rabies, baby
Are the only things coming our way
The journey of a thousand miles
Starts with the first little step
Said the man as he left his cell
And was escorted down the hall to his death
Well I have often heard it said
That fools rush in where angels fear to tread
This is probably just because
The angels are still home in bed
18.The Blues Song
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
We can stand naked on the corner of Main Street, baby, and
Let everybody slow down and take a look
You can drive your Cadillac to the library, baby, and maybe read
the
Last ten pages of an Agatha Christie book
You can feed my cat to my dog
And turn around and feed my dog to my horse
You can screw the whole damn royal family, baby, until they
All get a divorce
Baby, baby, baby
Baby, you can do anything you wanna do, baby
I swear it will not bother me
Cause, baby, you know
Baby, you know you've got to
You've got to
You've got to be what you're going to be
You can burn down the orphanage, baby, over there on the
Poor side of town
You can go to the circus, baby, frighten the elephants
See if you can get them to maybe
Trample a clown
You can steal the prize out of my box of cereal, baby, and
Replace it with a rat
You can walk up to someone who might be a little overweight
And be kinda sensitive about it and say
'Oh my god, you're really fat!'
Live and let live, baby
That's the cornerstone
The very essence of my philosophy
And baby
Baby, you know
You know you've got to
You've got to
You've got to be what you're going to be
I'm gonna play my harmonica
Since I charge $35 a note I'm not gonna play much of my
harmonica
You see the blues
The blues isn't an art form
It's not a type of music
The blues is a product
Not unlike computer chips or tampons
The blues is a way for white kids to feel
That they understand the feelings of black people
Without ever having to meet any of them
The blues is all these things and more
Available for $19.95
Oh, baby
Baby, you can do whatever you wanna do, baby
Baby, you know it's not going to bother me
Cause baby you know
You know you've got to
You've got to be what you're going to be
Here comes the solo
Ooh, and what a solo it is
You know
That might not be the blues but it sure makes me sad
Listen, in the distance
The sound of Leadbelly rolling in his grave
I've said it before, baby
I'll say it again
Live and let live
The very essence, the cornerstone
The summit of my philosophy
Baby, baby, you know
Baby, you know you've got to
You've got to be what you're going to be
A blues man needs a nickname
And everybody calls me Two Shoes
Cause I always wear two shoes
I know it's not much of a nickname
But by the time I got around to getting my nickname
All the good ones were taken
Take for example Blind Lemon Lipschitz
Blind Lemon Lipschitz gouged out his own eyes with his
thumbnails
So he could be called blind lemon
It's true, don't laugh
He felt the very essence of the blues, calling him from within
And he felt that contract too
Oh, baby
Baby, you know
Baby, you know you can do whatever you do
I don't care
I don't give a damn, baby
It's not gonna bother me
Cause baby, baby, b-b-b-b-b-b-b
You gotta
You gotta
You gotta
You gotta
You gotta be
You gotta be what you're going to be
19.Big Deal
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Life sucks, then you die
And your soul gets sucked into the sky
Birds sing, I wonder why
You eat a bowl of cereal and sigh
You're late for your class
You're walkin' the halls without a pass
Big deal
Big deal
Time flies, time crawls
You're a prisoner trapped between its claws
Life sucks, sometimes
You gotta learn to live between the lines
Your feet are on the ground
But the world keeps spinning you around
Big deal
Big deal
Don't be worried, don't be down
I'll be your stupid happy clown
Keep your chin up in the air
Shake your body like you just don't care
Birds sing, babies cry
Life sucks and then you die
Big deal
Big deal
Big deal
20.Big Lizard
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Big lizard in my backyard
Can't afford to feed him anymore
Big lizard in my backyard
Bustin' down my neighbor's door
I bought a big lizard only a dollar fifty
Well, that's pretty neat, yeah it's fuckin' nifty
But I just can't afford to feed it
And you should see the way it shits
I've got a big lizard in my backyard
Can't afford to feed it anymore
Big lizard in my backyard
Bustin' down my neighbor's door
I was knocked outta bed late last night
I was woken up by the sound of dynamite
I ran downstairs to find an army man
He said, 'We gotta blow up those things we don't understand!'
There's no more big lizard in my backyard
I won't have to feed him anymore
No more lizard in my backyard
They shipped his ass to El Salvador
Was knocked outta bed late last night
I was woken up by the sound of dynamite
I ran downstairs to find an army man
He said, 'We gotta blow up those things we don't understand'
Big lizard in my backyard
Can't afford to feed it anymore
Big lizard in my backyard
Bustin' down my neighbor's door
I bought a big lizard only a dollar fifty
Well, that's pretty neat, yeah it's fuckin' nifty
But I just can't afford to feed it
21.Instant Club Hit
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
You'll dance to anything
You'll dance to anything
You'll dance to anything
You'll dance to anything
Oh, baby, look at you
Don't you look like Siouxsie Sioux
How long'd it take to get that way？
What a terrible waste of energy
You wear black clothes say you're poetic
The sad truth is you're just pathetic
Get into the groove just get out of my way
I came here to drink not to get laid
So, 'Why don't you just go on home？'
'Cause if you want to moan you'll have to moan alone
You'll dance to anything
You'll dance to anything
Don't try to tell me that you're an intellectual
'Cause you're just another boring bi-sexual
I met Andy Warhol at a really chic party
Blow it out your hairdo 'cause you work at Hardees
80 pounds of make up on your art school skin
80 points of I.Q. located within'
Know what you are？ You're a bunch of
Artfags, Artfags, Artfags, Artfags
Choke on this you dance-a-teria types
You'll dance to anything by The Communards
You'll dance to anything by Book of Love
You'll dance to anything by The Smiths
You'll dance to anything by Depeche Commode
You'll dance to anything by Public Image Limited
You'll dance to anything by Naked Truth
You'll dance to anything by any bunch of stupid Europeans
Who come over here with their big hairdos
Intent on taking our money instead of giving your cash
Where it belongs, to a decent American artist like myself!
You'll dance to anything!
22.I'm Flying Away
Lyricist：Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
I'm getting on a plane
Early in the morning
I'm getting on a plane
Let this be a warning
Meet me at the airport
Flight 11-41
'Cause I'm flying away
To the one I love
I'll be at your place
Just in time for dinner
I can't wait to see your face
It's been a lonely winter
Absence makes the heart grow fond
But I can't take it any longer
'Cause I'm flying away
To the one I love
My alarm is set for 5 o'clock
I can't wait to hear it ring
My bags are packed, completely full
I have lots of stuff to bring
Arms to hold you
Lips to kiss you
A heart to love you
Oh, I miss you
I'm flying away
To the one I love
I'm flying away
To the one I love
I'm flying away
To the one I love
I'm flying away
To the one I love
To the one I love
23.The Girl With The Strong Arm
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
The girl with the strong arm has saved world cinema
Saved it from itself I like to think
The girl with the strong arm restores old paintings
Including one she found under the sink
The girl with the strong arm killed an innocent bystander
That leaves you with a mental picture
The girl with the strong arm drank straight whiskey
But I understand that she will still quotes scriptures
All poor gardeners pooled their resources
During the week long festival
Kneeling down to think about the future
Racing you would be quite dull
After many years of exodus
The hatchery fish run in rich rivers
I'm afraid the memories regarding Nixon
Are a little scary
The girl with the strong arm threatens the Quakers
They all say she's mad you know
The girl with the strong arm has an abrasive accent
She uses words like Eskimo
The girl with the strong arm stands beside a woman
Whose many parts add up to one
The girl with the strong arm makes political commentary
And yet I feel that it's all in fun
In your nightmares rub around
Those gay white males line up at church
Drink their coffee pretend to be a cowboy
Set aside an hour to search
Pulling up leaves like little Russian problems
Is now the tasty thing to do
The most popular sidearm with Canadian woodsmen
Is the blue steel woodchuck gun
Manufactured in Atlanta, Georgia
By the firm of Youse and Son
I find no fault with the two young lovers
Who dine all night on the candied eels
Then dance till dawn to a big band music
And the sound of baboon squeals
All last night I stared at jelly
Till I knew love was all around
Traveling through O'Hare airport
Dressed like a circus clown
The girl with the strong arm has started licking batteries
And that's kinda strange even for her
The girl with the strong arm would like to be a banker
But I don't think she's really sure
Using strings just to pull things over
Really keeps the party going
I'm not sure but the history of Denmark
Maybe the only thing worth knowing
Has it ever dawned on you
That car accidents just might be art
And all those kids in the foster care
Just don't think you're very smart
Down by the gunner on mother's day
In a state of perpetual bliss
Stands the man with the lisp
24.Peter Bazooka
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Tuesday, yes, it was Tuesday
When I saw my congressman coming out of the titty bar
He didn't look like my congressman but that's okay
Nobody really looks like themselves anymore
I think it's got something to do with that crap
They've been pouring into the water
I decided it might be wise to follow the congressman
Just to see what he was up to
After all, my tax dollars do pay his salary
The congressman got into a taxi, so I hailed a taxi
Despite the obvious dangers involved
And the colored voices in my head began to sing
All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall
And I can hear it all, yes, I can hear it all
All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall
And I can even hear the little insects crawl
The congressman was in taxi number 23
And I was in cab 17
But numbers are meaningless
In this kind of cat and squid game
My driver was an Aries
And he laughed when I said, 'Follow that cab'
And he kept laughing
Until he saw the cold blue steel of Little Elvis
'Keep your god-damn hands off that radio', I warned him
'I work for the government'
This is actually a half truth
I'm really a bike courier
But I make a lot of deliveries
To government offices
That's where I heard about the cheese
And the colored voices in my head kept singing
All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall
And I can hear it all, yes, I can hear it all
All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall
And I can even hear the little insects crawl
There's this super secret government program called
'Operation the cheese stands alone'
It's the congressmen's pet project
They claim that they're giving surplus cheese to the needy
I, of course, have my suspicions
After 15 very quiet minutes
The congressman's cab pulled up outside a warehouse
I had the Aries circle around the building and drop me off
He seemed to be grasping the importance of my mission
Since he said I didn't have to pay him
As long as I promised to stay very far away from him and his
taxi
I swear, some people just don't want to get involved
All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall
And I can hear it all, yes, I can hear it all
All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall
And I can even hear the little insects crawl
So I walked into that cold dark place
Little Elvis drawn and ready for action
I too was ready, ready for the moment
When I would be a real American
All I gotta do is bang my head on the wall
And I can have it all, yes, I can have it all
All I gotta do is bang my head on the wall
And I can even make the little insects crawl
All I gotta do is bang my head on the wall
And I can have it all, yes, I can have it all
All I gotta do is bang my head on the wall
And I can even make the little insects crawl
All I gotta do is bang my head on the wall
And I can have it all, yes, I can have it all
All I gotta do is bang my head on the wall
And I can even make the little insects crawl
25.Shapes of Things
Lyricist：James Stanley Mc Carty, Keith Relf, Paul Samwell-smith
Shapes of things before my eyes
They teach me to despise
Will time make man more wise？
Here beneath my lonely frame
My eyes just hurt my brain
But they don't seem the same？
Come tomorrow will I be older
Come tomorrow maybe a soldier
Come tomorrow will I be bolder than today
Now the trees are almost green
But will they still be seen
When time and tide have been？
Boy into these passing hands
Please don't destroy these lands
Don't make them desert sands
Come tomorrow will I be older
Come tomorrow maybe a soldier
Come tomorrow will I be bolder than today
Boy into these passing hands
Please don't destroy these lands
Don't make them desert sands
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
On my TV screen
Every Labor Day
Fuckin' Jerry Lewis
Make him go away
Make him go away
Make him go away
He's fucked up my Labor Day
Make him go away
One, two, three, four
Jerry Lewis, I'm comin' to get ya
You're gonna run, you're gonna hide
Jerry Lewis, this squad's gonna get ya
And make you commit TV suicide
Give him 24 hours
He'll do what he please
He'd be on welfare
If it weren't for this disease
Make him go away
Make him go away
He's fucked up my Labor Day
Make him go away
One, two, earth, shoe
Jerry Lewis, I'm comin' to get ya
You're gonna run, you're gonna hide
Jerry Lewis, this squad's gonna get ya
And make you commit TV suicide
His eyes get red
And his voice gets mean
I guess it's what you get
When you take amphetamine
Make him go away
Make him go away
He's fucked up my Labor Day
Make him go away
One, two, three, four
Jerry Lewis, I'm comin' to get ya
You're gonna run, you're gonna hide
Jerry Lewis, this squad's gonna get ya
And make you commit TV suicide
In France they appreciate me
In France they know I'm a genius
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
This next song is dedicated to the members of Why Guy
And it's called Milkmen Stomp
We are the Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are the Milkmen
The fucking Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are not F.O.D.
We are not Little Gentlemen
We are not Seed of Terror
We are not McRad
We are the Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Dead Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are the Milkmen
The Dead Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are not Blunder Boys
We are not Circle of Shit
We are not F.O.D.
We are not an art fag band
We are not a local band
We are from outer space
We don't even give a damn
We will probably smash your face
Stomp The Dead Milkmen
We are The Dead Milkmen
We are The Dead Milkmen
We are The Dead Milkmen
28.Bitchin' Camero
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Hey Jack, what's happenin'？
I don't know
Well uh, rumor around town says
'You might be thinkin' 'bout goin' down to the shore'
Uh, yeah, I think I'm gonna go down to the shore
Whadda ya gonna do down there？
Uh, I don't know
Play some video games
Buy some Def Leppard T-shirts
Don't forget your Motley Crue T-shirt
Y'know all proceeds go to get their lead singer out a' jail
Uh, uh
Yeah, let's go down
Hey, you were ya gonna check out the Sand Bar
While you're down there？
Uh, what's the Sand Bar？
Ah, it's a place that lets sixteen year-old kids drink
Ah, cool
Ya hey, guess who's gonna be there？
Uh, who？
My favorite cover band, Crystal Ship
Wow
Yeah, they do a Doors show, you'd be really impressed
In fact, it goes a little like this
Love me two times, baby
Love me twice today
Love me two times, girl
'Cause I got AIDS
Love me two times, baby
Once for tomorrow
Once 'cause I got AIDS
Uh
Pretty good Jim Morrison impersonation there
I hope those guys have a good sense a' humor
And don't take us into court
Uh, what's the court？
Never mind that, the important thing here
You mean The People's Court
The, now, that's another story
The important thing here is that we get to the part
Where you ask me, how I'm gonna get down to the shore？
Oh, how you gettin' down to the shore？
Funny you should ask, I've got a car now
Ah wow, how'd ya get a car？
Oh, my folks drove it up here from the Bahamas
You're kidding
I must be, The Bahamas are islands
Okay, the important thing here is that
You ask me what kinda car it is
Uh uh, what kinda car do ya' got？
I've got a bitchin' Camaro
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
I ran over my neighbors
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Now I'm in all the papers
My folks bought me a bitchin' Camaro
With no insurance to match
So if I happen to run you down
Please don't leave a scratch
I ran over some old lady
One night at the county fair
And I didn't get arrested
Because my dad's the mayor
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Donuts on your lawn
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Tony Orlando and Dawn
When I drive past the kids
They all spit and cuss
'Cause I've got a bitchin' Camaro
They have to ride the bus
So you'd better get out of my way
When I come through your yard
'Cause I've got a bitchin' Camaro
An Exxon credit card
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
Hey man, where ya headed？
Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro
I don't want unleaded
29.Labor Day
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
Every Labor Day
On my TV
Fuckin' Jerry Lewis
Fuck I don't want to see
Make him go away
Make him go away
He's fucked up my Labor Day
Make him go away
One, two, three, four
Jerry Lewis
I'm comin' to get ya
You can run, but you can't hide
Jerry Lewis
This squad's gonna get ya
Make you commit TV suicide
Give him 24 hours
He'll do what he please
He'd be on welfare
If it weren't for this disease
Make him go away
Make him go away
He's fucked up my Labor Day
Make him go away
One, two, three, four
Jerry Lewis
I'm comin' to get ya
You can run, but you can't hide
Jerry Lewis
This squad's gonna get ya
Make you commit TV suicide
His eyes turns red
And his face gets mean
I guess that's what you get
When you take Amphetamine
Make him go away
Make him go away
Make him go away
Make him go away
One, two, three, four
Jerry Lewis
I'm comin' to get ya
You can run, but you can't hide
Jerry Lewis
This squad's gonna get ya
Make you commit TV suicide
Make him go away
30.Milkmen Stomp
Lyricist：Joesph Genaro, Dean Sabatino, David Schulthise, Rodney
Underman
This next song is dedicated to the members of Why Guy？
And it's called Milkmen Stomp
We are the Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are the Milkmen
The fucking Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are not F.O.D.
We are not little gentlemen
We are not seeds of terror
We are not McRad
One , two , three, four
We are the Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Dead Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are the Milkmen
The Dead Milkmen
We are the Milkmen
Stomp, stomp, stomp
We are not Blunder Boys
We are not circle of shit
We are not F.O.D.
We are not an art fag band
One , two , three, four
We are not a local band
We are from outer space
We don't even give a damn
We will probably smash your face
One , two , three, four
Stomp, The Dead Milkmen
We are The Dead Milkmen
We are The Dead Milkmen
We are The Dead Milkmen
31.Don't Deny Your Inner Child
Lyricist：Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
There are others, and then there is myself
I must learn to distinguish the others from myself
They are separate people, with different personalities
They might not like the things I like
They might not eat the same food
Or they might not want to go to the places where I want to go
There are others, and then there is myself
There are men, and there are women
Often they don't get along
I must try to get along with everyone
No matter how stupid they might be
Or how asinine their opinions are
I must learn to love everybody
Even people who are so obviously inferior to me
That they make my flesh crawl
I will get to know these people
And I will cook them a ravioli dinner
From a can I found, in Mexico City
There are others, and then there is myself
I believe in the power of the human soul
I believe that the government is in control
I believe there's a Heaven up in the sky
I believe that my neighbors are human spies
Tomorrow I will begin bathing
This is the start of a 6 part plan
Which will take me into the next century
In the coming years, I will stop eating with my hands
I will let the dog out of the closet for some fresh air
I will put away the rubber mask
The cub-scout uniform
And yes, finally, even the cauliflower
There are others, and then there is myself
I believe in the goodness of all mankind
I believe that the government is reading my mind
I believe there's a god who loves us all
I believe in the Beatles, except for Paul
I must no longer neglect my inner child
For he is very close
Right there, under the floorboards
I will learn to get in touch with my feelings
Even the ones that will probably get me arrested
32.I Started To Hate You
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
This song fits the mood I'm in
Trying to push something out of a pen
Don't know how, where or when
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
It's kinda hard to explain
Your stories are never what you claim
After I played your little game
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
You used to be my friend
All those letters that you'd send
Suddenly they stopped and then
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I thought you were so cool
I wished that I went to your school
Then I broke my only rule
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
Wonder how you can be so mean
You're never really what you seem
I never was a part of your dream
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I started to hate you
I hate you just go away
I hate you just stay away
Don't wanna see you today
I hate you just go away
I hate you just go away
I hate you just stay away
Don't wanna see you today
I hate you just go away
33.Wonderfully Colored Plastic War Toys
Lyricist：D. Steagall, R. Steagall, W. Newton
I said, 'Let's do it man,
Let's torch the whole village'
We went down to look at war toys
Wonderfully colored plastic war toys
We went down to look at war toys
But all the war toys were gone
We went down to look at war toys
Wonderfully colored plastic war toys
We went down to look at war toys
But all the war toys were gone
All my life I've always wondered
What it would be like to fire off a bazooka
All my life I've always wondered
What it would be like to fire off a ballistic missile
We went down to look at war toys
Wonderfully colored plastic war toys
We went down to look at war toys
But all the war toys were gone
We went down to look at war toys
Wonderfully colored plastic war toys
We went down to look at war toys
But it seems that we were wrong
34.Rock 'N' Roll Queen
Lyricist：Mick Ralphs
Listen, woman, you needn't look so stupid
When I call your name out loud
'Cos everybody knows that you're a sweet-smiling girl
With intelligence, you know how
I wouldn't want anyone else to know
About the way you really are
You're just a rock 'n' roll queen
You know what I mean
And I'm just a rock 'n' roll star
Listen, woman, you needn't go to bed
With everybody that you meet
'Cos everybody knows that you're a sweet-smiling girl
With intelligence in your feet
I wouldn't want everyone else to know
About the way you really are
You're just a rock 'n' roll queen
You know what I mean
And I'm just a rock 'n' roll star
You're just a rock 'n' roll queen
You know what I mean
And I'm just a rock 'n' roll star
Just a rock 'n' roll queen
You know what I mean
And I'm just a rock 'n' roll star
You're just a rock 'n' roll queen
You know what I mean
And I'm just a rock 'n' roll star
You're just a rock 'n' roll queen
You know what I mean
And I'm just a rock 'n' roll star
35.Ask Me to Dance
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Ask me to dance
Ask me to dance
While the room around me explodes
This is your last chance
Just 'cause I have one leg
Don't mean I can't twist
I hop along peg leg style
And you act like I don't exist
This is a dancin' song
And I don't want to dance all alone
No, I don't want to dance all alone
Said, I'm not gonna dance all alone
'Cause I feel so lonely
Ask me to dance
Ask me to dance
While the room around me explodes
This is your last chance
Through no fault of my own
I was born to this child
Portable party, wallflower girl
Now, I'm going to dance free style
This is a dancin' song and I
Don't want to dance all alone
No, I don't want to dance all alone
Said, I'm not gonna dance all alone
'Cause I feel so lonely
So ask me to dance
Ask me to dance
While the room around me explodes
This is your last chance
What's a girl to do if she only has one leg？
Well, I imagine she could join a convent
Ask me to dance
Ask me to dance
Ask me to dance, ask me to
D A N C
Dance
36.Girl Hunt
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Gotta find myself a girl to hug and hold
Cuddle by the fire when the air is cold
Keep me company when I feel gray
A friendly girl who I can play
She must be good, she must be bad
She must be sweet and sometimes sad
She must not mind talking about death
She must not mind my stinking breath
Oh yeah, gotta find myself a girl
Oh yeah, Lord please help me
Find myself a girl
Oh yeah
Gotta find myself a girl who acts like a man
A girl who wants to hold my hand
A girl who knows what to say
When I tell her to go away
A girl who loves fish and eggs
A girl who never shaves her legs
Girl that smiles and sometimes frowns
A girl that'll tear my apartment down
Girl that likes to have a good time
A girl involved in organized crime
Oh yeah, gotta find myself a girl
Oh yeah, Lord please help me
Gotta find myself a girl
Oh yeah
I'm looking in New Mexico and New Orleans
Chicago, Philadelphia, Brooklyn and Queens
I'm looking in New Jersey, Green Bay
I'm looking all over the fucking entire USA
I'm searching for a girl, I don't care what size
I don't give a damn about the colour of her eyes
Her skin can be black, her skin can be white
She only has to love me and hold me tight
And dance with me and play me in the snow
And go with me to the local disco
Fly me back in the crack of blue
Shimmy shimmy shama go bamu
A girl that's kinda wild and never a bore
That's the kind of girl I'm looking for
Oh yeah, gotta find myself a girl
Oh yeah, Lord please help me
Gotta find myself a girl
Oh yeah
I'm searching, I'm searching all across the world
I'm searching, I'm looking for that one and only special girl
I'm lookin', I'm lookin'
All across the world
Gotta find myself that one and only special girl
37.If You Love Someone Set Them On Fire
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
Know that it would be untrue
Know that I would be a liar
If I was to say to you
I didn't set your house on fire
But it's just the way I am
Have to take it for a fact
Life can really burn you up
When you're a pyromaniac
So
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
I went to your house last night
Dad called me the human torch
Got a little pissed at him
So I burned down your front porch
Now I feel a little better
About throwin' gas on your dad
But you know it's hard to quit
And besides he started it
I just bought a brand new lighter
And I just can't wait to use it
With a can a' kerosene it's lots a' fun
You can't refuse it
Oily rags are special things
You know to me they're diamond rings
Maybe we can have some fun
Maybe we can burn someone
So
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
Know that it would be untrue
Know that I would be a liar
If I was to say to you
I didn't set your dad on fire
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
If you love somebody
Why not set them on fire？
If you love somebody
Better set them on fire
If you love somebody
Why not set them on fire？
38.I Don't Wanna
Lyricist：Anthony Joseph Genaro, Rodney Linderman, Dean Sabatino, David
Schulthise
One, two, three, four
I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Be a girl
I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Be in the world
I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Cut your hair
'Cause I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Have to care
I don't wanna be with you
'Cause I don't like the things you do
No, I don't like the things you do
'Cause I don't like the things you do
I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Punch your face
No, I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Kiss your lace
I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Be around
I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Fall and hit the ground
I don't like the things you do
I don't wanna be with you
I don't wanna be with you
'Cause I don't like the things you do
I guess you know
'Cause I don't wanna, I don't wanna
Break my word
'Cause I don't wanna, I don't wanna
You to speak to me
'Cause I don't wanna, I don't wanna
'Cause a scene
I don't like the things you do
I don't wanna be with you
I don't wanna be with you
'Cause I don't like the things you do
39.When I Get To Heaven
If I go to heaven, it'll probably be a slum
And all the pretty angels just might be packing guns
And if I see St. Peter will he hit me up for cash
Will I find the road to Jesus or just lose him in the trash
The Shaggs were right
You're never going to please anybody
Not in this world
If I go to hell, I might find it very dull
Like an Amway convention or an endless shopping mall
When all the innocent demons want to poke me with a fork
Or just put me in a taxi and send me to New York
Scientists proved it years ago
The Shaggs were much better than the Beatles
Maybe I'll return as an iguana
And lie upon a beach down in the Bahamas
Although ignored in their day
The Shaggs are now recognized as the geniuses they were
I just wanna know what happens when you die
Do you walk down in a hole or float up to the sky
Is it just a waste of water, when your widow cries？
Oh, don't tell me you've never heard of the Shaggs？
If the atheists are right then I have no need to worry
For there is no great being whose favor I must curry
And I'll be going nowhere once they lay me in the earth
So why waste a Sunday by going to church？
If you really wanted to
You could run out right now and buy a Shaggs record
If the atheists are wrong then I've got a bill that's due
So should I be a Christian or a Muslim or a Jew
Should I spend all day just praying on my knees
And searching through the world for a deity to please
A Shaggs record would be a sound investment
If the atheists are right then I have no need to worry
For there is no great being whose favor I must curry
The fat peoples want what the skinny peoples got
The skinny peoples want what the fat peoples got
But all I've ever wanted is what the Shaggs got
Dat Ding and my pal, Foot Foot
40.Like To Be Alone
Sometimes I like to be alone
Sometimes I like to be alone
But when I hear your voice
I don't have any choice
I want to crawl right through the phone
And I don't want to be alone
Sometimes I need to get away
Sometimes I need to get away
But when I read your card
I found it very hard
Not to be with you today
Sometimes I need to get away
God is gravity, God is the law
God is love so, love is the law
And love is gravity
I feel you, I feel you, pulling me
Sometimes I'm happy feeling sad
Sometimes I'm happy feeling sad
But when I think of you
I'm through with feeling blue
I think of good times we could have
Sometimes I'm happy feeling sad
41.Dance With Me
I feel ugly and dirty and tired
I can't get to sleep my head is wired
Can't get my mind off a stupid girl
Came into my life and wrecked my world
Got myself drunk got into a fight
Got my head knocked up and I don't feel right
This whole stupid world is bothering me
All I really want now is somebody to
Dance with me, dance with me
Dancing free when you dance with me
I got some records and I got a stereo
Lots of Sex Pistols and Curtis Blow
When I'm dancing I really feel great
'Cause I don't think about all the things I hate
I love dancing more than getting drunk
Dancing to rock 'n' roll, dancing to punk
If there is anything that is bothering you
Any time, any day, you are welcome to
Dance with me, dance with me
Dancing free when you dance with me
So you lost your job, someone stole your car
Your girlfriend left to become a star
Tried to kill the cat in the washing machine
So what, who cares？ What does it all mean？
Dance with me, dance with me
Dancing free when you dance with me
42.I Hate Myself
I hate myself, hate myself
And you, I hate you
I hate myself, hate myself
And you, I hate you
Roses are red and violets are blue
I hate me and I hate you
I hate my life and I hate yours
I hate my life and I hate yours
Let's get together and make a pact
Let's get together and make a pact
Let's get together and end it all
Let's get together in a bathroom stall
I, I take drugs, I take drugs
And glue, I sniff glue
I, I take drugs, I take drugs
And glue, I sniff glue
Roses are red and violets are blue
I take drugs and I sniff glue
I hate my life and I hate yours
I hate my life and I hate yours
Let's get together and make a pact
Let's get together and make a pact
Let's get together and slit our wrists
Let's get together and do the twist
I eat lye soap, eat lye soap
And stew and I eat stew
(Hello, Stuart)
I eat lye soap, eat lye soap
And stew and I eat stew
Roses are red and violets are blue
I take eat soap and I eat stew
I hate my life and I hate yours
I hate my life and I hate yours
Let's get together and make a pact
Let's get together and make a pact
Let's get together and end it all
Let's get together in a bathroom stall
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